Friday, October 24, 2008

The Seducer

I notice more and more,
My willingness to let you go.
But nothing is forced and I realize,
that the key is not in,
actually letting go,
but in the willingness to do so.
Still, a conscious releasing comes,
and my grasping of you loosens.
More and more each day,
and I'm left feeling what remains.
The love is just as intense.
Just as compelling.
But there is less attachment.
Dammit,
Why is it you always have
such palpable lessons for me,
even in your absence?
You come to me in my dreams--
again last night.
And it's just the same
as in my waking life.
I have no ability to disengage.
I am your slave,
with every right to say no.
But there is nothing to resist,
so I don't.
The power of your presence,
is a drug that overwhelms,
my ego's puny will.
So I watch myself,
do your bidding.
It's my pleasure.
I watch your drama,
and mine,
and ours.
The persuasion,
you have over me,
without even trying.
And I know you are
just a guy,
and not that special really.
Except to me and whoever else,
and has fallen to love you.
You are just you being you.
You are what my friend calls,
T
he seducer.

4 comments:

Greenwoman said...

Beautifully expressed. Sending you soft thoughts and witnessing. ((hugs))

Adrienne Parker said...

Thank you greenwoman. I'm witnessing it all too.

Bx said...

I can relate so well to this sentiment--it does take a long time to consciously deal with it.

You could cut it off (instead of letting go) but it is like cutting off a part of your heart, your passion...too much of that and you'd become dry and heartless...

Gently and lovingly letting go is the way. It takes longer...

love,
bx

Adrienne Parker said...

Exactly bx,becoming dry and heartless is the only way I could cut it off. He is a part of my heart, certainly one of the great loves of my life.