Tuesday, March 18, 2008

An Evolving Spiral Of Creativity

All day I've had this anxious energy in the core of my body, centering in the solar plexus and expanding outward. This energy is sexual in nature and feels like jealousy although I'm not jealous. I am stirred up with the anticipation of possibilities. I'm feeling very open, without fear.

What's coming up for me in this moment is the tendency we humans often slip into, putting pressure on the ones we love. It's too easy to get lost in expectations for Another to do our bidding, meet our needs, to be there for us even at the expense of being there/here for themselves.

Several years ago I got attached to the idea of being a low-maintenance friend--wanting to be a haven for my loved ones, a place of refuge and inspiration rather than a harsh task master at a high stress job. Not that relationships don't take a lot of focused energy and attention because they certainly do. But relational work must come from an internal devotion to Self that radiates outward, rather than an external motivation of pleasing, or simply "keeping the peace" with Another. We need to gear our relationships to work for love, rather than than hogtying love to work for our relationships. The later suffocates love.

When we allow fear and ego strategies to take the lead in our relationships, they manhandle us into into a descending vortex, a devolving spiral of entrapment and indentured servitude. Love struggles to survive in this environment. It feeds on freedom, its wildness, when welcomed by acceptance and trust, expands into an unlimited expression of possibilities, an ascending vortex, an evolving spiral of creativity and joyful service to Another.

2 comments:

Greenwoman said...

Great post...lots whirling in there. How ya doin with friends moving and such? Sending you hugs...

I AM ANOTHER said...

Yes indeed. Lots of whirling.

I'm hating it! Not liking it one little bit! Damn! I'm pouting and throwing a tantrum! I'm sad. I'm lonely. I'm missing her.

I'm ok. She's doing what she needs to do. I know she's good and so am I.

But, but, but...I want her with me always. I'm selfish that way.