Love Begets Love

I've seen this phenomena arise when parents separate and the ex's new partner lavishes love and attention on the child. The other parent becomes jealous of the affection being bestowed upon their child by the new person in their life. It's as if they fear the significant role they play in their child's life is being usurped and that their parental position must be protected at all costs. They feel threatened and work hard to maintain that special place in their child's heart.

I never understood this. It takes a village to raise a child. The more loving adults in a child's life, offering affection and guidance the better. When another comes along who's willing to step up to this position, it's true fortune. What a blessing. I adored everyone who adored my children and graciously accepted all the help I could get. A friend to my child is a friend to me.

I feel the same way towards people who bestow affection on my lovers. We all need love and affection and although I do my best to cover my bases and give love and attention, gosh, I'm only one gal and my time and energy gets spread thin. If someone else loves the one I love, I feel a natural affinity towards them. I love my lover's lovers.

Not that jealously hasn't risen in me because after all, I am human and imperfect and I have somewhat of a Queen Bee, "I am the Goddess Shewhobehot" complex and I like being treated as the most special one to the most special ones in my life. But I've also learned to share and to not take my complex too seriously, because after all, we are all most special.

I've noticed that my jealously tends to be triggered by people who don't want to share. When someone is after the exclusive rights to another's affection and sexual expression and would like to push me out of the picture altogether, then I don't appreciate that much at all. I do not like the experience of being punished because another feels threatened. How is me loving someone another loves a bad thing? I don't take too kindly to jealous manipulation and mean spirited jabs hurt my heart. Love begets love and the more love we give, the more we get. My intention is to do my part in spreading the love around.