Two Partners

Mistress Matisse has a post on polyamory today which doesn't get very specific and how to find her archived posts. She mentions her two partners, how long she's been with each of them (5 and 10 years) and how she doesn't use the terms primary and secondary much anymore.

michael jackson billy jean

This was always my favorite Michael Jackson.

Flow Charts and Planning Calendars

You know, one of the challenges of polyamory is not jealousy or health issues...

Mistress Matisse posted a blog about flow charts yesterday.

Keeping everyone on the same page is a BIG issue in polyamorous relationships. Plus, there may be unlimited love to go around but time is finite. Organization helps everyone make better choices about where they want to be and with whom, at any particular time. Routine and structure (with spontaneity and flexibility encouraged to suit people's individual styles) helps poly relationships flow smoother. Planning calenders seem to be mandatory and everyone setting aside the time to get together and schedule in commitments and dates (whom will be with whom, where and when) is essential. Everyone needs their fair share of time and attention from their lover and also, down time to be alone and/or with other friends, family, and other life callings.

This post about flow charts is where it all starts. It's about getting important information out to all the significant players. If this, that, and the other thing, needs to happen, or is already happening, everyone needs as much advance notice as possible. It can be difficult to remember who told what to whom and who's wanting what when. Flow charts serve to keep us all on the same page. Once the flow chart is in place and everyone is filling in the pertinent information, it's time for the planning calendar to come out.

Do I keep a flow chart? No way. Do I have a planning calendar, yes indeed. Could my system be improved for efficiency? Most certainly.

The Neville Brothers - Amazing Grace / One Love

Let's get together and feel alright!

Neville Brothers - Tell it like it is

Aaron Neville sings with Greg Allman and Bonnie Raitt!

Not Rocket Science

As my friend Pema recently said:

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that being in relationship with you is all about going deep. The soul knows what it's getting itself into.

That said, I'm not an incredibly high maintenance person that makes unreasonable demands on my partners. I mean, going deep just comes with the territory of truth, love, sex, and freedom--yes?

I really don't like discovering that I'm the only one who actually jumped in and now I'm left swimming back to shore alone.

Well as long as I'm out here in the middle of the ocean I might as well dive down deep. I've donned my mermaid tail for strength and I'm curious to see what treasures I may find.

Plus, just to make sure my intention is clear. I am more than willing to jump off into deep uncharted waters--I'll do just about anything for the adventure of love and enlightenment. And I'll brave the storms that come along too. But let it be known that I want a good part of my adventures to be relaxing on the warm sandy beach of a calm ocean.

Runners Make Me Want To Run

Runners make me want to run. And I don't mean joggers. Runners meet my abandonment wounds head on and trigger my own shut down response.

I was going to write more and link again to Gillette's post on Runners but when I went to her site she had a new post today called Leonian Grasp and Flow with Runners directly underneath. I think I'll just leave it at that.